Journey Through Time

We took our daughter trick-or-treating this year in our new neighborhood, in our new town, in our new state... with our new friends. (We have only 2 I think at this point). As we walked around from house to house and waited on the girls to reach each doorstep and dash to the next, I had that feeling in my soul that a profound moment was coming, in my heart.
I thought about last Halloween, 2004. We were at our little townhouse community in beautiful Alexandria, VA. And with a host of friends, and tons of kids, we strolled through the entire neighborhood, with a glass of red wine :) We were talking politics of course. Just moments away from the capital of this amazing country, and days from one of the most controversial elections in our history... just about everyone had an opinion and was willing to give it, if they hadn't until then. Earlier that day, my 3 best friends had run the Marine Marathon in downtown D.C. and I, not one to be much affected by peer pressure to join the insanity, arranged a little pep rally with the dads, and kids. Grace's best friend Emma made a card for her mom (my dearest friend, Paula) which read, " I love you mom... I hope you won." It still brings tears to my eyes... We miss Emma so much. She didn't understand that running a marathon, and finishing... WAS winning, for 3 average moms who one day over a cocktail on a girls weekend in Georgetown decided they wanted to do something great. I was so proud... I am STILL so proud.
My mind's eye took me back for some reason, on this journey through time...remembering where we were at, what we were doing...each year seemed like just mere days before this very moment. It led me to wonder if time would always travel so swiftly. I imagined one day, when Grace would be calling me, to tell me of trick-or-treating with HER daughter...like I phoned my mother that evening. And I realized that time...is cruel. I am afraid of few things... truly afraid...but one would be time. I know that memory is such a blessing, and I love thinking about the places we have been, and the people we have loved. But I am terrified of looking back one day, and finding my daughter is all grown up... and time has passed me by. I am so busy... and everyone I talk to every day is "so busy..." and sometimes when I find I am shewing away the people I love, so that I can finish "this one thing..." that leads always to ten more... when I snap out of it I grab my little Gracey, and I hold her in my arms. I hug her and kiss her, and sometimes I even still hold her. It becomes more awkward each time, as she grows taller and taller. I know pretty soon, her body won't fit between my shoulders and my waist...and that worse yet, someday she won't even want me to hold her any more... now THAT is sad.
I think in a way, that is why I am so passionate about my business. Because time is cruel...and we simply won't recall all of the moments that make us laugh, or smile...or cry. At the moment it is everything, but days quickly turn to weeks and months...and years. And suddenly the details are sketchy at best. Grace's little girl or boy will one day want to know that she was a "pretty witch" for Halloween this year, or that when she was 2 she cooked Winney the Pooh in her plastic frying pan (poor Winney), or that when she saw sunlight coming through the window, she would step on it, or jump over it...it was a fun game. Life moves so quickly. I suppose it takes a monumental occasion to make us stop and recall, that very moment in history... I did that tonight.
I realize of course, that I have lost the anti-sappy people by now, possibly some if not all :) But my thought is simply to slow down, and really take inventory on the things in life that really matter. I keep a couple of special things near my dressing table that I try to look at every so often. One of them is a card from my grandmother. It is addressed to my dorm room in college, and I saved the envelope. As I torture myself, and read the card... I imagine what I was doing in my life at that moment, when I received it initially. In the card, my precious Grandma Compton (who has since gone to be with the Lord) said to me "Tasha, I love you and think about you all the time. Some time, call me collect... when you have lots of time, and feel lonely." It is one of my greatest regrets... that I didn't call. I remember this, when I think of time... and the people I love. I realize that one's wealth should truly be measured by the people we have loved, and those who have loved us. I am reminded that life is too precious to muttle through being "busy" and detached emotionally from the only things that do truly matter.
I hope everyone who does celebrate Halloween had a wonderful time. And I hope your stroll around the neighborhood took you on a journey through time as it did me.
Happy Halloween ;)